Sunday, November 09, 2008

Wheatbugs Choosing Poorly

Wow. Today was just one of those days where, despite a lot of things happening and a lot of people saying witty things in my immediate vicinity, I have nothing to say myself.

It's not normal for me to have nothing to say. Many parents teach their children that if you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all. My parents taught me that if you don't have anything to say, say something anyway (oddly enough, this lesson was taught more by example than by actually being verbalized. I find that ironic).

So here I am with nothing to say. Common convention would have me be silent, but my upbringing dictates the opposite. In fact, it is the very state of nothing-to-say-ness I am experiencing that has influenced my topic choice today.


This is getting us nowhere. Let me see if I can explain it in a different way:

Once upon a time, there was a little kid named Mandrake. Mandrake had a large head, three extra toes on his left foot, a dimple in his right cheek (but, sadly, not in his left), and had been awarded second place in the Branchtonville County hot dog eating contest of 1983. In his hand, Mandrake held a picture of a monkey. This picture had been taken not at a zoo, as one might expect, but in the frozen food section of the local Food Lion. It was wildly assumed that Mandrake had the one and only copy of this picture.


Okay, that tactic seems not to be working. Let me try this:

'Twas in the living room he sat
the man without an orange hat
he couldn't leave while raindrops spat
and so he stayed to pet his cat


Random thoughts are not an unusual occurance in my head. I once spent an entire day endeavoring to say at least one thing to every person I talked to that was utterly unexpected. I asked my boss if she could cut keys; I asked a coworker if he felt snails would pole-vault if they could; I even asked my doctor if he was getting enough fiber in his diet!

I'll tell you, that was an entertaining day!

So here I am, with nothing to say. I have to let my mind decompress sometimes, so what better place than here on my blog! I don't even plan to go back and re-read this one! So until next time, Shazbot!

-Sage Words


Geezerguy said...

I must say, you've done your upbringing proud tonight. You had nothing to say, and said it very clearly...although it could have been a bit longer: There's a reason the term "ad nauseum" has survived all these years.
PS- I'm in deep doo-doo with Yarntangler...somehow she found out who posted that comment yesterday. I'm baffled.

Yarntangler said...

Correct me if I'm wrong, what you are saying is that your parents taught you to keep talking when you have nothing to say-by example?

If that's the case, then perhaps Winston Churchill said it better when he advised that when one has nothing to say, then one should not say it.

Ah, but when faced with the dreaded blank page, we all find our own way to cope don't we?